But what if the rules weren't written for us? What if the rules we were supposed to follow only served to dilute us into more of the same human mush. What if the rules that were made for our well-being ended up putting us in a corner or pinning us against each other in a fight for survival?
Rules can be great, but only when they serve the purpose they are created for, and most rules are not meant to allow individuality to shine through. So, how do we, as parents, teach our children the difference between rules that they may have to follow, for now, and rules that they should re-write?
How do we navigate the stormy sea of 'shoulds' imposed by society?
How do we remain part of something yet at the same time retain the courage to separate ourselves from the norm when the norm doesn't quite fit?
Here are three questions I ask myself when I feel like the rules no longer serve their purposes:
1. Why does this rule not work?
2. What would be a better rule for me/my child/or this situation?
3. What do I need to be/become/find/learn in order to write and follow a new rule that supports who I am?
By re-writing the rules that hinder our being, we give ourselves permission to re-write our lives.